DEAR DEIDRE: MY husband took a sickie so he could have sordid sex on his fancy woman’s birthday, so I chucked him out.
We’ve been married for 10 years and we have two kids and I knew he’d been having an affair for the past 18 months.
He swore to me it was over so discovering he’d sneaked off on her birthday was the last straw.
She’s one of the parents from the school where he teaches. She’s 41 and divorced. I know her. She swans around in her sports car done up to the nines.
My husband is 45 and I’m 43. I first found out he was seeing her when I found condoms in his car.
We don’t use them so he couldn’t deny cheating when I confronted him. He said he would end it but he was still very guarded with his phone.
He went to school one morning wearing jeans so I got suspicious and stalked the woman on Facebook and there was the evidence – her birthday – he wasn’t sick at all.
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When he returned later that evening I didn’t even give him the chance to put the key in the door before I kicked him out.
He’s a great dad though and has the kids at weekends and sees them in the week.
I’ve started online dating and I’ve met somebody who I’ve been seeing for four months. He’s 39 and is lovely. He treats me right.
My daughter told her dad I was dating and suddenly, he’s been in touch saying he wants to come home.
He says he’s missed us and wants us to be a family again. I still love him and I’d like that but I’m not sure whether I could trust him.
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
DEIDRE SAYS: Does he really want to be back home again or is this jealousy on his part?
Don’t do anything quickly. You’re in the driving seat now.
He’s got a lot to prove that he is feeling sincere and that his ex is no longer part of his life.
My support pack called Torn Between Two Men may help you to decide if you do want him back.
Whatever you do, don’t rush into welcoming him back. If you decide you do want to try again, then a counsellor can help you to move forward because your relationship is going to look a whole lot different this time around.
Contact Tavistock Relationships for support (www.tavistockrelationships.org, 020 7380 1975).
