A MAN has revealed that he discovered his six-month-old baby isn’t in fact his after a secret paternity test.
After suspecting something was up when he caught his wife smiling at her phone, the father decided to take matters into his own hands and do a test.
A man has revealed that he discovered his six-month-old baby is not actually his after a secret paternity test[/caption]
The man shared his heartache and confusion at what to do next[/caption]
But the anonymous man has been left heartbroken at the results, which have revealed his partner’s infidelity.
Opening up about the situation, the man took to social media to share all, leaving many open-mouthed.
Posting on Reddit, on the r/offmychest thread, the man wrote under the username @thoughtsouthere and titled his post ‘Did a paternity test behind wife’s back and my son isn’t mine.’
He then confessed: “I’ve known for over a month that she’s been cheating on me. For how long I’m still not sure.
“The fact that she goes about our everyday life like nothing is going on makes me want to scream sometimes.
“Seeing her smile on her phone pretending her sister sent her something and knowing she’s talking to him.
“I’ve felt this twist in my gut ever since and started wondering if it’s possible I’m not my son’s biological father. And I couldn’t take it anymore.”
After doing a secret paternity test, the man shared: “He’s not mine.
“She doesn’t know I got a paternity test done. My wife doesn’t know I know she lied about who his father is.
“And have had to live with this knowledge for almost a week. While still going through the motions of caring for a six month old baby.”
Clearly distraught at the news, the Reddit user wrote: “It hurts so bad. Literally takes everything I have not to cry at any moment because she still doesn’t know yet.
“I can’t stay with someone who would hurt me this deeply. Five years down the drain like that.
“Every night like tonight I just want to pack my stuff and leave her before she wakes up. Then never see her again.”
Four red flags your partner is cheating
Private Investigator Aaron Bond from BondRees revealed four warning signs your partner might be cheating.
They start to take their phone everywhere with them
In close relationships, it’s normal to know each other’s passwords and use each other’s phones, if their phone habits change then they may be hiding something.
Aaron says: “If your partner starts changing their passwords, starts taking their phone everywhere with them, even around the house or they become defensive when you ask to use their phone it could be a sign of them not being faithful.”
“You should also look at how they place their phone down when not in use. If they face the phone with the screen facing down, then they could be hiding something.”
They start telling you less about their day
When partners cheat they can start to avoid you, this could be down to them feeling guilty or because it makes it easier for them to lie to you.
“If you feel like your partner has suddenly begun to avoid you and they don’t want to do things with you any more or they stop telling you about their day then this is another red flag.”
“Partners often avoid their spouses or tell them less about their day because cheating can be tough, remembering all of your lies is impossible and it’s an easy way to get caught out,” says Aaron.
Their libido changes
Your partner’s libido can change for a range of reasons so it may not be a sure sign of cheating but it can be a red flag according to Aaron.
Aaron says: “Cheaters often have less sex at home because they are cheating, but on occasions, they may also have more sex at home, this is because they feel guilty and use this increase in sex to hide their cheating. You may also find that your partner will start to introduce new things into your sex life that weren’t there before.”
They become negative towards you
Cheaters know that cheating is wrong and to them, it will feel good, this can cause tension and anxiety within themselves which they will need to justify.
“To get rid of the tension they feel inside they will try to convince themselves that you are the problem and they will become critical of you out of nowhere. Maybe you haven’t walked the dog that day, put the dishes away or read a book to your children before bedtime. A small problem like this can now feel like a big deal and if you experience this your partner could be cheating,” warns Aaron.
But the man shared his conflicting thoughts, as he continued: “I’m torn though because the second I look at his crib my heart doesn’t want to leave him.
“He’s not my biological son, but I still love him so much. No matter how hard I’m trying it won’t turn off.
It’s like tearing my heart out
Reddit user
“The idea of never seeing him again makes my heart feel way too heavy and gives me such anxiety.
“It’s like tearing my heart out, I can’t do it.
Dear Deidre help for those dealing with paternity fears
DEIDRE SAYS: Not knowing whether this baby is yours must be very distressing.
But be aware that genetics are not straightforward, and it’s common for brothers not to look alike. A baby can inherit genes from previous generations, so don’t rely on appearances.
Unfortunately, only a DNA test can tell you for sure if the baby is yours.
If your partner were to claim child maintenance and you disputed parentage, then you may be able to get a DNA test.
You can find out more from the Government website (gov.uk), which has a section on disagreements about parentage on its child maintenance page.
If you’re not sleeping, see your GP. Ask your GP about counselling, as it’s important to talk about your feelings.
“It’s midnight and he’s currently dozing in my arms because the only time I’m given any kind of peace is when I’m holding him.
“He didn’t ask for this mess either so we have that in common. I just don’t know what to do now.”
REDDIT USERS REACT
Reddit users were left gobsmacked by the man’s situation and quickly flocked to the comments to share their thoughts and advice.
Whilst many encouraged the man to see a lawyer, many advised him to leave his wife.
I’m so sorry. As everyone has said, lawyer up… and remember he is your son
Reddit user
One person said: “Don’t say anything to her before talking to a lawyer first!!! So many things can explode on your face if you try to talk such important things out with someone who’s already backstabbing you in every way possible.
“Collect your evidence and protect yourself first so you can safely be informed about the ways you can go about this. I’m so sorry.”
I really think lawyer should be the first stop
Reddit user
Another added: “You need to leave this woman, that is absolutely disgusting she cheated on you, and is making you care for a child that isn’t even yours.”
A third commented: “I really think lawyer should be the first stop. They’ve seen things, they can show you options.”
Whilst someone else expressed: “I’m so sorry. As everyone has said, lawyer up… and remember he is your son. You’ve raised him since he was born.
“He is currently in your arms getting comfort and love. Love him unconditionally and let him bring you many years of joy moving forward. Regardless of his mother.”
