A MUM has been left in disbelief by photos of her partner’s actions at a wedding he attended without her.
She stayed home with her toddler and their six-week-old baby as the bride and groom had a ban on kids.
The mother said her partner danced with another woman at the wedding, while she stayed home with their kids (stock image)[/caption]
She said her partner took a “short plane journey” to their friend’s mid-week wedding.
A woman he used to speak to before their relationship was set to attend but she wasn’t concerned because “nothing physical had ever happened apparently.”
“When I was pregnant with our first, a text from her popped up asking if he wanted to play an online game,” she said, posting on Mumsnet.
Flirting with another woman in front of people who know you, while you were stuck home with his babies. Yuck
“I thought it was odd but he said they played prior to us meeting and he hadn’t spoken to her while we’d been together.
“I was a bit dubious that anyone would text so out the blue but accepted it, although had a snoop at her fb/insta and saw that he had liked all of her pics, which were primarily selfies.”
On the day of the wedding her partner and the woman seemed cosier than anticipated.
She found photos of them dancing together among snaps of the guests posted online by the groom.
“The photo is just of them and while it looks more like regular dancing than slow dancing, he is beaming looking at her, her hand very close to his as if they’d just let go holding hands,” she said.
“Looking at it anyone would think they were a (very happy) couple.
“AIBU [am I being unreasonable] to not be suspicious if anything further happened and/or to just feel a bit sad?”
Responses to the post were torn if the photo was a red flag that required confronting her partner about.
“I’d be hurt. Especially with a 6 week old baby – it’s a vulnerable time,” one person said.
“You need to talk to your DP. He’s not acting at all well at the moment.
“When you’re 6 weeks postpartum, he should be protective and helpful to you, not flying off to weddings leaving you to cope while he dances the night away.”
Four red flags your partner is cheating
Private Investigator Aaron Bond from BondRees revealed four warning signs your partner might be cheating.
They start to take their phone everywhere with them
In close relationships, it’s normal to know each other’s passwords and use each other’s phones, if their phone habits change then they may be hiding something.
Aaron says: “If your partner starts changing their passwords, starts taking their phone everywhere with them, even around the house or they become defensive when you ask to use their phone it could be a sign of them not being faithful.”
“You should also look at how they place their phone down when not in use. If they face the phone with the screen facing down, then they could be hiding something.”
They start telling you less about their day
When partners cheat they can start to avoid you, this could be down to them feeling guilty or because it makes it easier for them to lie to you.
“If you feel like your partner has suddenly begun to avoid you and they don’t want to do things with you any more or they stop telling you about their day then this is another red flag.”
“Partners often avoid their spouses or tell them less about their day because cheating can be tough, remembering all of your lies is impossible and it’s an easy way to get caught out,” says Aaron.
Their libido changes
Your partner’s libido can change for a range of reasons so it may not be a sure sign of cheating but it can be a red flag according to Aaron.
Aaron says: “Cheaters often have less sex at home because they are cheating, but on occasions, they may also have more sex at home, this is because they feel guilty and use this increase in sex to hide their cheating. You may also find that your partner will start to introduce new things into your sex life that weren’t there before.”
They become negative towards you
Cheaters know that cheating is wrong and to them, it will feel good, this can cause tension and anxiety within themselves which they will need to justify.
“To get rid of the tension they feel inside they will try to convince themselves that you are the problem and they will become critical of you out of nowhere. Maybe you haven’t walked the dog that day, put the dishes away or read a book to your children before bedtime. A small problem like this can now feel like a big deal and if you experience this your partner could be cheating,” warns Aaron.
Another agreed that he had behaved inappropriately and urged the woman not to ignore her suspicions.
“At best, he was flirting with another woman in front of people who know you, while you were stuck home with his babies. Yuck,” they said.
“Did he offer to stay home? He should have. They’re his kids too.
“Never, ever, dismiss your own intuition.
“Do not allow him to minimise and downplay this. Have a frank discussion and pay very particular attention to his responses.
“Don’t allow him to play the DARVO card. At minimum he has embarrassed you and made you feel rotten.”
However, a third argued that they were “reading too much” into the photo.
“He probably was enjoying dancing with her – people dance at weddings and dancing is fun,” they said.
“That’s what the photo captured. That’s all. This woman is an acquaintance.
“Whilst you both must have thought it was a good idea for him to represent you both at the wedding it probably wasn’t. He is needed at home.”
A mother has been left unsure how to react to a photo of her partner dancing at a wedding (stock image)[/caption]
